(To set the scene, or lack thereof, I am a new persona of this Schizophrenic hate blog. I am ProfG, a random lit nerd.)

Friends, S'poreans, countrymen, lend me your ears;
I come to heckle Celeste, not to praise her.
The chiobu that men see stick in their minds;
The soul is oft forgotten with their homework:
So let it be with Celeste *NOT*. The noble L
Hath told you Celeste was ambitious:
If it were so, it was a flaunted fault;
And grievously hath Celeste flaunted it.
Here, under leave of L and the rest,—
For L is an honourable girl *HA*;
So are they all, all honorable girls *HAx2*,—
*Bwahaha. Jk, I love them all*
Come I to speak at Celeste's funeral.
She was a stranger, dumb and meaningless to me:
But L says she was ambitious;
And L is an honourable girl.
She hath brought many videos back from Youtube,
Whose clips did the bimbo blog fill:
Did this in Celeste seem ambitious? (YES)
When that the boy has sung, Celeste hath gushed:
*In center alignment withal!*
Ambition should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet L says she was ambitious;
And L is an honourable girl.
You all did see that on the Blogger
I thrice presented her a hateful tag,
Which she did thrice refuse: was this ambition? (No, it was bitchy)
Yet L says she was ambitious;
And, sure, she is an honourable girl.
I speak not to prove what L spoke,
But here I am to speak what I do know.
You all did love her once,—not without cause: (She acted cute)
What cause withholds you, then, to mourn for her?—
O judgment, thou art fled to bitchy blogs
And women have lost their reason!—Bear with me;
My brain is in the coffin there with Celeste,
And I must pause till it come back to me.
*When the bimboticism finally ends*

(There you go folks, I've lost my bitch blog virginity. Was it... good? *Use of dramatic pause* Tell me! Thanks. ProfG)

It came to my attention some ppl dont know what that is a satire of...

http://pd.sparknotes.com/shakespeare/juliuscaesar/section10.html

L: you're damn neutral.
G: i dont need to hate her to be pretty.